slashymoviereviews.com

You’d think that as a die-hard slash fan, I would have known better. I mean, take “Top Gun” for instance: despite the aircraft, the love-story with the hot female instructor (and the most cringeworthy sex-scene in history until “Watchmen” came along), and lots of supposedly uber-straight guys, I’d never believe for a second that this [...]

This is a chick flick. Don’t be fooled by its violent, pretentious, wannabe-dystopic plot. It features the ultimate female fantasy: Hottie Christian Bale stars as a guy who can kick ass and then learns how to feel. It’s like “Batman Begins”, but backwards, and without Katie Holmes (and Liam Neeson delivering ridiculous Qui-Gon-on-vengeance monologues).

There is a notion that’s commonly let loose upon the world by adults who refer to themselves as artists, have no grasp of their own mediocrity, and presumably want to hide that by dazzling the general public with how deep they are. That notion is: “Sometimes, you have to suffer heartache and be unhappy to [...]

The true extent of my fangirlish corruption didn’t hit home until I watched a Saint Martin’s procession and it occurred to me that there had to be an epic, X-rated love story between the beggar and the gallant Roman soldier in there somewhere. As if to reaffirm my depravity, the preeminent notion my brain came [...]